I Recommend The Co-op App
I am being positive for once
Greetings, citizens of Chazzy’s World! I see you, oinking and squirming for your trough to be filled with slop. But don’t worry, it’s feeding time, piggies! Here are your weekly content rations.
After spending the past week and a half tearing down one upstart business, I’ve decided to continue playing Hermes, God of Commerce. This week, I’ll be putting my finger on the scale in favor of a company: the Co-op rideshare app! [applause]
The Drivers Cooperative is a rideshare platform that is 100% driver-owned. (Their app is called Co-op.) That means all profits go to the drivers who get you from one place to another. It represents a significant challenge to Uber (ideologically for now, but hopefully financially) and its exploitation of drivers in New York City. Considering the spate of suicides by cab drivers and the seeming failure of a bill that would allow gig workers to unionize, it can’t come soon enough.
By telling you everything good about Co-op, I can also show you everything bad about Uber. Let’s try it:
Co-op costs less!
You’ve probably gotten used to paying more to do the right thing: farmer’s market produce costs more than Dole fruit sprayed with adrenochrome; good vegan food costs more than hydrogenated ape rectum at McDonald’s; ordering sex toys from Amazon is cheaper than buying them at a thrift shop or yard sale.
But not so with Driver’s Co-op. Drivers Cooperative does not have a CEO who makes $42 million a year or venture capitalist investors to pay first. Drivers Cooperative has no plans to waste $1 billion on self-driving and flying cars that didn’t pan out and killed a woman. It is not spending $200 million on lobbying in favor of a California bill they wrote themselves to classify workers as independent contractors. That all means much lower expenses and better prices for the rider. When I rode with Co-op, it cost $21 versus $31 on Uber and Lyft. I’ve priced out a bunch of other rides to frequent destinations (the orphanage where I volunteer, Le Bernardin, your mom’s house) and Co-op costs at least 30% less than Uber every time.
Drivers make more! Much more!
Eliminating all those pesky Silicon Valley middlemen doesn't just mean cheaper rides for you. It means the guy driving you around takes home a significantly larger portion of the fare. Between the 25% commission, booking fee, and the “safe rides” fee (Chazzy’s Note: what?), Uber takes more than 40% of your fare.
When I rode with Co-op, I talked at length with my driver. (I wanted to sleep with him.) He told me that he would take home nearly 100 percent of my $21 ride. The only deduction was a weekly contribution to the Cooperative itself, which pays for app development and other costs. He estimated that was less than $100 a week and considered it well worth it. And wouldn’t you? A day’s work for him is $250. He can make that in four or five hours driving with Co-op, versus ten hours driving for Uber. He said he still picks up Uber passengers if he feels like it, but makes sure to give them a Co-op business card and show off his Co-op t-shirt. That’s why he is the recipient of this week’s Chazzy’s World ‘Grind ‘Til You Shine’ Money Mindset Award. Congratulations!
Of New York’s 85,000 Uber drivers, 91% are immigrants. 70% have less than $1000 in savings. More money in their hands means more money spent in our own city, more money spent at small businesses, and more vibrant neighborhoods. Sounds better to me than paying for Travis Kalanick’s $36 million SoHo penthouse, at least until I am invited to a party there.
Drivers have access to fair financing for their cars!
This feature of the Drivers Cooperative is a bit more behind the scenes, but could perhaps make the most difference to exploited drivers. Uber and Lyft’s business model relies on offloading as many costs as possible to drivers; the most obvious example is the car itself. Gas, maintenance, insurance, cleaning, and licensing are also the driver’s responsibility. Sure makes you think: what the hell does Uber actually do?
Rideshare driving is such a difficult way to make money in part because you need a $30,000+ piece of equipment to start the job. The rideshare workforce is easy prey for lenders and car dealers, often promoted by Uber, who saddle them with onerous rates and give them bad deals on bad cars. By the time many drivers pay their car loans and other driving-related expenses, they take home almost nothing. That’s why Drivers Cooperative partnered with the Lower East Side People’s Federal Credit Union, so members can refinance their loans and get fair rates. I volunteer to be the celebrity spokesperson for LESPFCU in a Shaquille O’Neal-The General-style partnership.
Drivers have more control!
One of the lies Uber and Lyft like to push is that they offer their drivers “freedom.” As they would have you believe, rideshare drivers have control over when they work, where they go, and which rides to accept. In practice, this is not the case. Uber’s algorithm punishes drivers for declining rides, even if the distance and direction make it unprofitable for them. My Co-op driver told me that the Uber app has started telling him when he can and can not accept customers, completely invalidating any idea of “freedom.” With Co-op, drivers can decide when they work, how much they work, and which rides are worth it for them. The lack of an algorithmic rating system on Co-op also benefits the average Chazzy’s World reader, who is known to upchuck, fornicate, and play airhorn sound effects over the music like a Power 105.1 DJ while riding.
And for all of this exploitation, all this abuse, at least Uber is making money, right? Nope. Uber has actually never turned a profit, despite tens of billions in annual revenues. The company lost $6.8 billion in 2020. When it IPO’d, Uber warned it might never make money. A study in the Transportation Law Journal agreed that “Uber has no ability — now or in the foreseeable future — to earn sustainable profits in a competitive marketplace.” As it stands, my Co-op driver is winning: the 21 bucks he made from my ride is greater than negative 6.1 billion.
Look, I’ll be honest. Does Co-op have an amazing app? No. When I was transporting a group of boozed-up, horny party animals from dinner to a party like Moses herding his flock, did Co-op glitch, causing me to give up and call an Uber? Yes. Do I think it will improve because it is less than a month old? Also yes. A legitimate argument against Co-op is that they have not really developed a solid set of safety features yet. While it’s dubious that Uber actually cares about rider safety, I agree that a comprehensive safety plan should be Co-op’s immediate next step. But I believe in Co-op. It’s a cool alternative to an exploitative system and an exciting reminder that with a little organization, everyone benefits.
So from now on, if you don’t feel like riding the subway and want to waste money, you actually have to call a Co-op in order to get your daily Socialism points. I don’t make the rules!
If you want to learn more, this video by Edward Ongweso, Jr. is a great explanation of how Uber works. He is a journalist, which I am not. Try to remember that before you email me — I am allowed to lie.