I've found a new favorite activity — and it's drinking two beers in the bathtub
A hot bath is a nice treat. With two beers, it's sheer delight.
NOTE: Starting today, every Chazzy’s World post will be written in the style of Guardian columnist Adrian Chiles.
They say the best things in life are free. I tend to agree, so long as kisses from the missus and hitting the snooze button remain gratis. But last I checked, Bud Light cans don’t grow like dandelions and my water bill is not subsidized. So that means drinking two beers while taking a bath — surely one of life’s finest things — still costs money.
Just the other night, I found myself with a rare evening to myself. I had no social plans and no work to catch up on — just the way I like it after a long, hard day. I was about to flip on the television and waste my whole evening. That is, until I remembered I had cold beer in the refrigerator and a bathtub.
As a very young lad, I hated the bath. Now, nothing entices me more than stripping down and sitting in a tub of hot water. Same goes for drinking two beers. As a child, the taste of beer repulsed me. But as I’ve aged, my palate has evolved to love the flavor of fermented starch sugars and hops. Beer gives me such a pleasant feeling that I often find myself having too much!
While I find baths and beer wonderful in their own right, their sum is simply divine. Though my bathtub is not the most expansively sized or elegantly appointed, it still accommodates my frame. The tap runs plenty hot and a cheap suction stopper from the hardware store keeps it full for hours at a time. As for beer? Well, I can’t seem to get enough.
I downed half of the first beer waiting for the tub to fill up. I stepped in and the warm water melted my stress away the second I sat down. The first beer was gone shortly after. All the while, another beer waited patiently for me on the ledge of the tub so I did not track water across the floor scampering nude to the fridge.
By the time I’d cracked that second can open, I was well on my way to a perfect night in.
Charlie Sosnick is a Chazzy’s World columnist
Dear Chazzy. This is beautifully written and thank you for sharing your experience. The second beer is truly divine. There is nothing in the world that can beat underwater lukewarm nudity mixed with mild alcohol use. - love u and thx